Anonymity

It's really interesting how much you can stand out, even in a sea of red and grey uniforms. It doesn't matter that I wear the same thing as every other girl in my school, I'm still almost constantly aware of the fact that I look different that everyone else. I'm the exchange student, and I can't forget it, because  even now, three weeks into the school year, I get stared at a lot. A lot. I can't decided if it really truly bothers me or not, I guess what I don't like is how self conscious it makes me.

I've had to reason through why I get stared at so much. The US is incredibly diverse, and on top of that diversity, I went to an internationally focused school, so having at least a few exchange students every year was completely normal. Ecuador, on the other hand, is far more homogeneous. I'm one of only a handful if students without black hair, and blonde-ish in a group of black stands out. My school has hosted exchange students before, so I'm not a complete oddity to everyone, but its easy to tell that the student body is still fascinated by the fact that we exchange students look so different. Sometimes being one of  three foreigners is nice, people tend to be really interested in why we came to Ecuador, what our home countries are like and what not. Yesterday, when I was walking to my dad's office after school, a group of girls called my name (because they knew who I was even though I didnt know any of them) and proceeded to ask all about the US, how i liked Guaranda/ my host family/school and all of the other questions that everyone always asks me. A lot of times, I miss the anonymity that a diverse population provides. It's nice to fit in, even if you don't look like everyone else. When everyone looks different, it's a lot harder to stand out. This general trend of being stared at follows me around everywhere, except when I'm with the other exchange students, my family, or other people that already know me. I hadn't really thought about this before getting here and experiencing it first hand, and they certainly never said anything about it in any orientation I went to. Honestly it's just weird, I don't like attention like that, but there's nothing I can do to make it go away, so I guess this is one of those situations that the AFS staff would tell me to adjust and get used to life with this. Easier said than done, but hopefully not impossible.

Another exchange student perk (or situation where we're treated differently) is with the Jura a la Bandera,  a very important ceremony for all of the "seniors" where everyone has to pledge themselves to the Ecuadorean flag. This is an all day affair. It involves a whole choreographed march where everyone marches around the courtyard in sections and flags of all of the cities and provinces of Ecuador are held around the perimeter of the school courtyard. Because its such a big deal, my entire grade has been practicing this organized marching all week. I mean all day, every day, all week. I've had all of five classes this week so far, and the rest of the time I spend sitting on the concrete bleachers, watching the endless march. Why do I sit and watch? Exchange student privilege!(kinda). I can't participate in the ceremony, because I'm not Ecuadorean. I'm not really sure why that's a rule, because other AFSers are participating at their schools, but for whatever reason I can't. I was actually a little relieved that I don't have to participate because as as cool as it would have been to have that experience, it also means I don't have to spend four days marching the same formations over and over again, and I don't have to buy a third uniform (the one for the ceremony is called the "parada"  and includes pantyhose, heels, and a bright red blazer). It also means that I've read a ton in the last few days. I need to find a bookstore here, ASAP.

The other AFSers and I leave for our second orientation tomorrow afternoon and I'm really excited to see all of the other students from Ecuador, and also to go to the coast. I'm excited to exchange stories and experiences, an also be in warmer weather. Guaranda is beautiful, and I love that the weather can be just as unpredictable at in Colorado(if not more), but I get cold easily, so the warm weather will be a nice change :)

It's completely crazy to think that I've been here for an entire month. The time has both flown by and also gone so slowly. Things feel normal now, and even though there are still things that can be hard,  I've been having a ton of those "I absolutely love it here" and "I can't believe that this is my life" moments, which are basically the best feelings ever! I really hope that I keep having those kinds of moments in the future, because the first month was really hard. Homesickness is awful, and while it hasn't gone away, it's becoming something that I'm not noticing all the time  anymore. It's exhausting to be constantly missing home, so it's super nice for life here to start feeling like a new home!

Hasta luego,

Elisa